Thursday, June 30, 2005

Girl of One's Dreams, But Not One's Fantasies

This website just got back from a plant tour at Toyota, and let this site tell you, they blinded this site with Scions.

This site, in yet another stunning apology, would like to say "Sorry" in advance for bringing up Fantasy Football this time of year. Yes, this blog is well aware that it is depressing to think about that all-consuming subject right now. That said, this blog recently was pondering its recent fantasy football plight and doing some mental regression analysis (oh yes, this site does mental regression analysis, as psychotic as that sounds).

In an inexact hypothesis, the blog figures that its relations with the opposite gender seem to have an inverse relationship with Fantasy Football draft success. This may not come as any surprise to those familiar with the reclusive and anti-social behaviors associated with many Fantasy League gurus. The reason this phenomenon came up is that, in the 2 years preceding this one, this website has been dating around the time it formerly would be completing intense research on statistical minutiae.

When involved on the dating scene, this site often foregoes checking open dates for setting up dinner dates; eschews rookie 40-times for local movie times, and cares more about looking nice than looking at some nice running back z-scores. What has been the result of sparing the Roto and spoiling the girls? Unfortunately, it's not too positive.

Two years ago, despite a solid regular season, during which it outperformed all other teams in its league, the blog finished a disappointing 3rd in its league. Last season, the website entered 2 leagues. While this effectively "hedged its bets," it may have been too great of a challenge to take on, primarily while dating. For the first time in 10 years, the blog did not qualify for the playoffs in its traditional league. As a consolation, the blog did take a strong 2nd-place in its new league. This was little solace with concern toward it's draft, as the catalyst to its playoff run was a late acquisition of Julius Jones, as well as a league that used an unbalanced schedule leading to a post-season slate of marshmallows. As far as the dating went, let this site just say that it's finished in the dating equivalent of the cellar for 24 years running.

The lesson to be learned here is that while, on their own, Fantasy Football and the dating scene may be great recreation, the combination of the two does not seem to facilitate complementary success.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm visitor 69! Yea Biatch! Thanks....

4:45 PM  
Blogger Cooler Brian said...

Awesome, this site got visitor number.....69!!! Thanks to Drewski and the folks at Greyscale www.daveabel.com for their dramatic efforts.

4:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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1:35 AM  

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