Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Nerve Taxation: Now With Representation!



Uh, if you saw the title, it means that this blog taxes your nerves. But the point is that you can now vote for which hat this blog will wear with the pictured sweatshirt! Bear in mind that there's plenty of time to vote for this. The sweatshirt, at present, is on pace to be worn Friday, March 24th. That has a standard deviation of about 5.0 days.

The options are (top row, beginning from top left):

1. New York Mets mesh hat. It's black, this blog got it at a Foot Locker about 4 months ago for $3.00. Not a huge story behind this one. Hasn't caught on with a shirt in the order yet. This blog is a fan of mesh hats, so it would be cool to wear this one. Has an added bonus of a foam-padded front, which this blog also likes.

2. Cincinnati Bearcats flex-fit hat. Red one in the back. Got it at Hat World in Columbus, OH for $5.00 1 month ago. Also has not caught on with a t-shirt as yet. This blog isn't a huge Cincinnati fan, but the price was right, and it's a quality hat as far as craftsmanship. There is an off-chance that the hat will be relevant, although this blog would be totally floored if Cincinnati made it to the Sweet 16.

3. Marquette Golden Eagles adjustable cotton hat. Navy blue. Got it on hat night at the Bradley Center for the Marquette-St. John's game February 1st. Another hat that is unmatched at present. It's kind of a neat hat since it's got the new Marquette logo, as well as the new Big East logo on it. Another hat that has some chance of relevance since MU could theoretically get to the Sweet 16. Though slightly more likely than UC, this blog would again be astonished with that turn of events.

4. New York Jets flex-fit hat. Green one. Was a Christmas gift from my uncle. Hasn't gotten into the order just yet. It's a really cool hat, it was the official sideline hat for the Jets this year. NFL Draft isn't until April 29th, so it's not likely to be very relevant. On a day when this blog had its choice, this would probably be the one it picked for the shirt, since it's high-quality and this blog doesn't have too much green in its repertoire.

5. Western Michigan Broncos adjustable cotton hat. Black with gold and white logo. Got it at Steve & Barry's maybe 6 months ago for $4.00. Has not gotten into the order as yet. Decent hat, price was right. They have virtually no chance of making the NCAA tournament, much less winning 2 games there, but they do have a pretty cool Bronco logo, and they also did beat Marquette last year in the NIT. Not a bad hat when hanging around MU fans.

(Bottom Row, starting far left)

6. San Diego Padres throwback fitted hat. Brown and yellow. Got it as a Christmas present 2 years ago from my brother. This is one of this blog's all-time favorite hats. It is matched up in the order, but this blog just loves wearing the thing. Matches with absolutely nothing, not even itself, but that's what makes it great. Best of all is that it's historic, the Padres wore this for several years in the 1980s. Another strong candidate if this blog was picking the hat on its own.

7. Imperial Cerveza adjustable cotton hat. Black and yellow. Got this as a Christmas present from a friend this year. Apparently this is the most popular beer in Costa Rica. It's not a bad hat, fairly innocuous. It's not officially paired with a shirt right now, but it has a high likelihood of catching on by 3/24 since it matches well with a pre-existing shirt, and this blog will be getting some shirts between now and then, opening up new slots for the current hat to move to.

8. Arizona Cardinals mesh hat. Maroonish-red and white with black brim. Got it for $10.00 about 8 months ago. It is matched in the order, but not especially well, so it may be knocked out of the order by 3/24. This blog likes the particular hat for a few reasons. First, it was the official draft day hat of the Cardinals 2 years ago. Second, this blog wanted to purchase it for a couple years, but waited for the price to drop, figuring no one was going to want a Cardinals hat. This blog was vindicated when it found it on sale in July, the only team available in that style.

9. Cincinnati Bengals adjustable brushed cotton hat. Black & orange hat on the far right. Got it for $10.00 on 9/18/2005 in Cincinnati. Currently matched in the order, will likely be moved when the Imperial Cerveza hat gets put into the order. It's an alright hat, this blog got it because it had 3 other teams' hats in the same style. If memory serves correctly, it was the official 1996 pre-season hat. Possibly 1997 though.

10. Pacific Tigers fitted hat. Black & orange hat in very front. Got it for $15.00 at the Pacific bookstore last March. It is matched in the order. One of this blog's favorites as well. Last year's run by Pacific was a neat season to pay attention to. Pacific also a pretty picturesque campus. From this blog's perspective, Pacific can do no wrong.

Well, there you go. Let the voting begin. Just post a comment with your favorite option. Ideally everyone signs in with their name so there's no "ballot-stuffing," but this blog is content to wear whatever, so it's no big deal either way. In the event of a tie, this blog will cast the deciding vote, among the tied entries.

11 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cincinnati Bengals hat. Who Dey!

Dank

7:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'll vote for the Jets hat, with an option to change to the MU hat if they make the Sweet 16.

8:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I gotta go with the San Diego Padres hat.

"Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina."

"No, there's no way that's correct."

"I'm sorry, I was trying to impress you. I don't know what it means. I'll be honest, I don't think anyone knows what it means anymore. Scholars maintain that the translation was lost hundreds of years ago."

"Doesn't it mean Saint Diego?"

"No. No."

"No, that's - that's what it means. Really."

"Agree to disagree."


Also, the Padres play the Athletics in a Spring Training thriller on 3/24.

9:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I vote for the Brewers hat, and I love the Gold Toe socks!!

12:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Buy yourself a Corona or a Heineken hat. That's way more fun!

12:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like sports; I like professional football. I like to get to the stadium and see the games live, you know. And I paint my chest before I leave the house. But I don't have many friends, you know, so I usually just do punctuation and tack on a group already in progress. But sometimes it works out kind of weird because we ended up on TV one time and it said 'JETS?'

5:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gotta go J-E-T-S Jets, Jets, Jets. Lack of green in the wardrobe being the key reason.

Besides, Marquette hats aren't good for much besides pissing on.


- Moike

5:00 AM  
Blogger Cooler Brian said...

A "talk-in" vote was also submitted, suggesting the Cincinnati Bearcats hat because the "C" on the hat would go with the "C" on the shirt.

6:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Imperial Cerveza!

Beer is good for ya. If you wear the hat you must drink the beer.

9:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, whoever submitted the "talk in" vote has very keen powers of observation to pick up on the coordination of "C's" possibility.

My choice is for San Diego for two reasons: 1)the connection to your German heritage 2) the "C" on the shirt could stand for crap, which the predominent color of the hat closely resembles

A second choice would be the Western Michigan hat. Sadly, it seems to be receiving a cool reception in the voting. Go MAC!!

1:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm voting for the Jets hat. It matches well, but then again every thing matches on Cooler Brian. Your clothing matching chart is by far the most detailed thing since the NCAA Tournament Bracket.

5:39 PM  

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